You heard her story, you see her countenance, but you don't know the inner truth. Her views, her say, she limits it all 'cos there's always secrets to life.

Saturday, September 29, 2012

This Is My Space

I don't want to make this sound so cliche, but I really think this is true. You cannot love the person who tries to change you. Even maybe if the person don't change you literally, but when you feel like there's a need for you to change yourself to fit into his/her needs, his/her desire, then stop. Stop loving the person. That's not what you are. If you were to change yourself you'll regret it. Cos eventually he/she will just leave you. Either tell you straight in the face, text you "Let's remain friends" or maybe just disappear like a silent treatment. That will not give you any good. But trust me, even though that change is not good, there's another side of changes that you'll make for yourself. And that is, realizing how cruel some people are, realizing that you're never good enough for any relationships, realizing that love doesn't exist. And even sometimes, some people just don't realize it yet even after numerous heartbreak over and over again. Even after countless advice given by their love ones, they can never realize the real world that they're confined in. That's fate. That's your life. You've got to live with it. If you think there's a need for you to change yourself to fit into your "partner" needs, don't. Instead, change your perception to the things you see. Change yourself for only yourself, and not others. Don't try hard enough just to please them. What's the price? You won't get anything out of them especially if two hands don't clap.

This is just some things I wanna share. Some things that I've been wanting to write but my hands or my mind isn't allowing me to do so. This blog here is very open, thus things I share, names that are mentioned, it's exposed, although I don't expect anyone to read my blog. It's just a space for me to write down my feelings. Cos this is the ONLY place I can let it go. Let go of all the frustration and sadness and yes, of cos I would like to share my happiness as well. But please, don't destroy this. Don't destroy what I have here. This is my ONLY space. Be it for my own benefit or even for others.

And sometimes I really wish I could inspire someone else. Or save someone's life, although I did, by donating my blood. But hey, I don't think that's enough. I want someone to look up to me and say "Hey, I respect you and admire for your personality." I really do want people to say that. I don't care what others might think, "Oh, you've got such a big ego!" But honestly, I'm pretty sure many of us want to feel that way. I wish my brothers will someday say "I wish I'm like you." Aspiring people, especially my siblings is what I want. But it's not easy.

Also, I may just quote some cliche phrases somewhere in the internet and bombast them to everybody, but when I do that, I really mean it. Maybe I don't really have a sense of originality to use some bombastic words or sentences that catches everyone's attention, which I don't want to. And I wish I have that ingenuity in me. But that's me. Maybe my sense of creativity only comes when I do Art. So please don't blame me for not being smart enough to write just short lines to describe what I actually wanted to say. Cos I can't do that. I'm the person who love to write lengthy lengthy essays and I wish I can never stop, sometimes.

That's the reason why I start all this. The reason to why I start blogging. Because some people just don't like to hear me talk my way through about things that I want to share which may probably waste hours of their time. Oh, wait, let me reiterate the word, HEAR. Cos not everyone can hear anyone.

Goodnight.  ❤

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