You heard her story, you see her countenance, but you don't know the inner truth. Her views, her say, she limits it all 'cos there's always secrets to life.

Tuesday, October 4, 2011

Be grateful for each day

Have you ever wonder why so many people can post "Good morning" and feel very elated about it and why rarely people say "Good evening"? Think about it. Then why do people say "Good night?" Because, nothing bad happen when we wake up. And during the day, we had went through events which sometimes we wished it never happen. And people say good night hoping tomorrow will be a better day.

That's what I feel every day, in fact I believe everyone feels the same.

Then I'm sure every time we hear our parents shouting at us saying "You can get out of the house anytime you want. The lesser children I  have, the easier my life will be, the lesser I spend, the lesser stress I'll have."
I'm sure most of us have heard of this line thousands time before. And I'm sure almost everyone feel like picking their self up and leave straight away so that they will have what they want. But some of us, insist to stay. Why? Do you ever wonder? Maybe because some of us know due to religious purposes, we are not allowed to leave the house although our parents "shoo" us away. And some feel that they know their parents are just saying things like that because they care for us or maybe they are decent kids who do not want to leave the house. Well as for me, it's due to religious stuffs. I've always wanted to leave the house since my parents said so. I always feel that they are not sincere in giving birth to us. And I felt like I shouldn't be born. But, something have always stop me from packing my stuffs and leave, Mama always reminded me that although Abah always wanted to throw us out, we MUST NEVER LEAVE! Because, our home is our heaven. And our heaven is under our mum's feet. And if we were to leave, we won't be at peace in the aftermath. So, that has always been in my mind.

Well, rough times will come and go. Today wasn't a good day for me. I had a terrible flu this morning maybe because I was lacking of sleep. Yesterday night was horrible! Went to to bed at 1 but kept rolling because as usual sis was on her lappy and kept on clicking and typing. I even tried to put on my headset to hear classical songs, but oh, it doesn't work! Eventually, she stopped because she was watching her drama online. Thank God. Woke up at 12.30pm :/ and had my shower and got ready to go to Sheng Shiong. Was kinda pulling a long face because my whole body was aching and my flu just keep running. Bought lots of food at Sheng Shiong and I managed to grab some vegetables for myself.

Well actually I was hesitating to take them because it's Abah who's paying them. But I did so. When we got home, we ate and all. Until in the evening, the volcano erupted. It all started from Firman, and my mum starts scolding him and that's when the real monster comes in and scolded everyone in the house. That's when he mentioned stuffs which made me pack my stuffs and leave.

That's the reason why I NEVER ask my parents money. I've living independently on myself except that I have a shelter under their names and they've been feeding me ONLY AT HOME. The rest, like shopping, school fees, school items, necessities like clothes & shoes and etc, are all paid using my own money. People ask me where you get the money from then? Well, since primary school, I was in the financial aid scheme and the money have been saved since then and in addition, I received bursary awards for my outstanding result performances each year. Just imagine if those schemes are not there to help me out. Where will I get the money then?

Okay. I'm not gonna prolong my blog today. Am really fatigue. Feel like falling sick, but oh no. Better not! That's all for today. Am really sorry if I'm letting out all my frustration here. May peace be upon you.

Hadith of the day:

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